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Tips for Separated Parents

Separation can be tough on everyone, especially children. Here are some simple tips to make it easier for you and your kids.

  • >Show Love and Care: Make sure your children know they are loved, even if parents live apart. Give hugs, smiles, and lots of eye contact.

    >Be There for Them: Let your children know you’re always ready to listen to their needs.

    >Enjoy Their Company: Show that you are happy to see them when they come home or when you pick them up from school.

    >Stay Connected: Keep in touch regularly, even if they live with the other parent. Phone calls or emails can help maintain a close relationship.

    >One-on-One Time: Spend quality time with each child doing something they enjoy, like reading a book or playing a game.

  • >Maintain Normalcy: Try to keep their daily routines, school, and friends as unchanged as possible.

    >Family Rituals: Keep some family traditions like bedtime stories or morning greetings to provide comfort and stability.

    >Clear Rules: Let your children know the rules in your home. It’s okay if the other parent has different rules.

    >Consistency: Be consistent and fair with rules and boundaries to help your children feel safe.

  • >Listen and Understand: Encourage your children to talk about their feelings and let them know it’s okay to feel that way.

    >Reassure Them: Make sure they understand that the separation is not their fault.

    >Find Support: Help them identify other trusted adults they can talk to if they need someone else to confide in.

    >Prepare for Comments: Discuss how they can respond if other children talk about the separation.

    >Coping Strategies: Brainstorm ways to cope with tough times, like talking to someone or doing fun activities.

  • >Know Their Coping Ability: Consider their age and personality when planning post-separation arrangements.

    >Help Them Manage Feelings: Teach them to express and manage their feelings. Use calming techniques like deep breathing.

    >Avoid Overwhelming Changes: Delay additional transitions like moving or new relationships to help them adjust gradually.

    >Age-Specific Reactions: Young children may show anxiety through irritability or sleep problems. School-aged children might have trouble concentrating or show behavior changes. Adolescents need strong support to avoid withdrawing emotionally.

Work with the Other Parent

  • Cooperate When Safe: If possible, maintain a cooperative relationship with the other parent for the child’s benefit.

  • Support Their Relationship: Encourage a strong bond with the other parent unless it’s unsafe.

  • Respect Differences: Accept different parenting styles if the children are safe and secure.

  • Avoid Conflict: Do not expose children to conflicts. Use respectful communication and resolve issues calmly.

  • Family Violence: If there is any violence or abuse, it’s crucial to seek help and prioritize safety.

    Legal and Support Services: Use legal advice and support services to ensure safe arrangements for the children.

  • >Timing is Key: Think carefully about when to introduce new changes like moving or new relationships.

    >Give Time to Adjust: Allow children time to settle into new routines before adding more changes.

  • Grieve and Heal: Allow yourself to process feelings of loss and grief.

    Healthy Coping: Develop healthy routines like exercise, relaxation, or hobbies to manage stress.

    Support Network: Lean on family, friends, and support groups for help.

    Physical Health: Maintain a healthy lifestyle with good nutrition and enough sleep.

    Seek Professional Help: Don’t hesitate to get professional support if needed.

  • Resilience: Remind your children (and yourself) that families come in all shapes and sizes and that they can thrive.

    New Routines: Create new family traditions to foster a sense of togetherness.

    Patience: Be kind to yourself and patient with your children as everyone adjusts to the new situation.

Remember, you are not alone, and there are resources and people ready to help you and your family through this time. If you need more information or support, don’t hesitate to reach out.

Seeking Help

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health, it’s important to seek help. With the right treatment and support, individuals can manage their symptoms and lead fulfilling lives. Reach out to mental health professionals, your GP, or our organisation for more information and support. We are here to support the Tamil community in discussing mental health openly and finding the tools to help and support each other.

Remember you are not alone.

Share this resource with your friends and family and help raise awareness about mental health in the Tamil community. Together, we can create a community where everyone feels comfortable talking about mental health.